105. Reach A Hand Children’s Ministry and Orphanage Center
April 27, 2021
Written by Pastor Henry Lubega
When you do someone a favor, do you expect them to reciprocate? Or do you give freely, without expecting something in return?
Some people expect to benefit every time they do something. It doesn’t matter whether they go out of their way for a friend, perform a chore at home, put in extra hours at the office, bend over backward for a customer, or console a neighbor in a time of need. And even though they might not express their expectation right away, you know it’s coming. That’s because they’re keeping a mental tally — and they have VERY good memories.
Not just that, some folks manipulate others by using The Law of Reciprocity. This powerful psychological principle states that if you give someone something, the recipient will feel compelled to return the favor. It doesn’t matter if you give someone a gift, a kind gesture, or a material possession. The result is the same — they’ll feel that they owe you! If you think this type of giving is disingenuous, it is. When you give something with strings attached, your focus is on how you’ll benefit personally. On the other hand, when you give of yourself without expecting something in return, your entire focus is on pleasing the recipient.
You’re not really giving if you expect something in return. If you think people benefit from a selfish mindset, you’ve got it all wrong. Giving shouldn’t come with demands, conditions, a hidden agenda, or a scorecard. When you give of yourself and expect something in return, it’s a transaction not a kind gesture. You have one eye on your actions and the other on what you’ll get in return. That not only takes you away from the moment, but you can’t do your best or be your best when you have a hidden agenda.
You might not always benefit from giving of yourself. But you can take great pride in knowing that you’re making a positive difference in the world. While takers may accumulate a lot of things in life, they’ll never experience the joy of being a giver.